


Losing Balance

by baeconandeggs, magicdraining (jadeu)



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-10
Updated: 2016-05-10
Packaged: 2018-06-07 16:11:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,279
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6812707
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/baeconandeggs/pseuds/baeconandeggs, https://archiveofourown.org/users/jadeu/pseuds/magicdraining
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What was supposed to be a one night stand turns into something more for Baekhyun when a snowstorm keeps him in for another night with his ex-boyfriend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Losing Balance

**Author's Note:**

> what i had in mind when i claimed the prompt and was outlining the story are totally different from what i have actually written. i think this is a _two night stand_ au but i'm not so sure? this is definitely inspired by the movie. i'm sorry there are lots of unnecessary shit going on in the story but i still hope you'll enjoy! thanks to j for staying up w me until 4am just to talk about what happens next

_**December 10, 2015** _

Baekhyun doesn't know why he's sitting in the dry bath tub of someone else's house. He only came to this party because of Jongin, his roommate, who proposed an opportunity for him to socialize. But he doesn't know anyone here, even the host of such a loud party. Well, that should be the point of socializing... Baekhyun shrugs. He can hear the electro dance music all the way into the bathroom, each beat thumping in sync with his heart.

The tiles on the wall seem interesting enough that he has finished counting them within ten minutes before he rolls his eyes at his pathetic self. He gets his phone out from his pocket, noticing the weather update about heavy snow fall or something, and starts browsing his Instagram feed. There's a photo of a blueberry cheesecake that makes Baekhyun almost drool despite being in the bathroom. The blueberries on top look so juicy and just- he couldn't resist cheesecakes, generally. He almost taps the heart button but then he sees the username of the person who posted it.

How the hell did _king_pcy_ 's post get into Baekhyun's feed? He doesn't even remember following his ex-boyfriend's Instagram. Did he perhaps accidentally clicked that button when he was stalking him on nights he became lonely? Or worse, did he follow back this—

He checks his notifications tab and sees that some time ago, his ex has accepted a follow request Baekhyun definitely doesn't remember sending. And right after, he gets a follow back from the guy.

First of all, when did his account go private? He recalls all those nights he sta- looked at his photos for the past three years that's why he didn't have to follow him. But now... His ex just had to know that he is still curious at how he's been doing. His heart beats faster than the EDM and there is also this strange thing he feels in his stomach now, like- _Wait, what?_ Why is he even over-thinking all of this, making a mess of what possibly is nothing more than just his ex being friendly to him? If his ex was able to accept his follow request and followed him back, that only means that he has completely moved on and is no longer attached to their old memories as sweethearts... right? But why is the image of his ex having moved on clench Baekhyun's heart tightly? Why is the thought of his ex— Baekhyun's mind is seriously spinning around. And he hasn't even drunk booze yet.

Those questions remain unanswered, or denied, because a distraction has called upon Baekhyun.

"Baekhyun hyung!" A voice shouts from the hallway of the house's second floor. It's undoubtedly Jongin, his evil roommate who may have been using Baekhyun's own Instagram account for his personal satisfaction because he doesn't have one. He also may or may not be the one who followed his ex.

The door to the bathroom opens and there's Jongin, looking at Baekhyun like he's utterly disappointed at his friend and roommate right now.

And he is. Of course, he is. His plan, constructed together with Sehun, was to make Baekhyun be with someone tonight so he and Sehun can have the apartment by themselves. How can that be accomplished if the subject of his plans is being a wallflower? No, scratch that, he's being a caveman in this bathroom.

"Hyung! I thought you wanted to move on from your seven-year long heartbreak? You can't do that if you're not out there socializing," Jongin whines with a stomp of his foot, kinda hoping that Baekhyun is going to pity him and go downstairs to associate himself with other human beings. But before Jongin can showcase more of his puppy eyes and pouty lips, Baekhyun gives him a glare as he stands up from the bath tub.

"Don't 'hyung' me, you brat," he spits out. "Did you follow some j-jerk on Insta with my account? Because I certainly don't remember following-"

"Oh, right," Jongin interrupts, "I also forgot to mention that I followed a really great hyung I think you'd-"

"Nini!" There's a third voice from the hallway that completely disrupts their entire conversation. It's Sehun, Jongin's boyfriend. When he sees Baekhyun, he tells him in an exaggerated excited voice that weirdly sounds motherly, "there's blueberry cheesecake in the kitchen, hyung!"

And that's Baekhyun's ultimate weakness – blueberry cheesecake. It makes him submissive to these brat duos.

The next thing Baekhyun knows, he's sitting on the kitchen counter and staring at the snow that's falling outside the window directly in front of him. Hmm, his phone app must have been correct with that weather update.

Sehun and Jongin have dragged him downstairs after finding him in the bathroom but that's all they have done. They left him alone to get fat in this kitchen and Baekhyun is too lazy to go upstairs again. There's cheap liquor in a red cup on his right side, an empty saucer from where two portions of blueberry cheesecake were placed until Baekhyun ate them all, and now, wrapped around his fingers, is a bottle of some disgusting beer. Baekhyun still drinks it.

He doesn't know why he's still drinking when he complains about the taste after every gulp. But he still grabs a second bottle of that beer.

»»»

One of the things Baekhyun takes pride of is his alcohol tolerance. He's definitely not a lightweight; he can take his liquor pretty well. That's why it's quite surprising that Baekhyun is napping on a stranger's couch when everyone else already went home.

The party has finished before Baekhyun can consume his fourth bottle of disgusting beer and somehow, he's been cuddling the arms of the sofa and has dozed off. Jongin and Sehun have gone home without him; their operation gone successful.

Baekhyun is still quite disoriented when someone probably as drunk as he is wakes him up from his nap. "Hey," a baritone voice calls out.

There is a halo radiating around the guy's outline when he looks down at Baekhyun. The florescent light does weird things to the petite guy's poor eyesight when he imagines his ex-boyfriend standing before him. He closes his eyes and rubs at them but it seems like he will never be sober tonight because he's still imagining his ex-boyfriend. If they're remotely look-alikes, it's already a deal-breaker for Baekhyun.

He should really be moving on from him already, he sighs.

"Jongin said you were going to have a one night stand... so I don't know why he left you here with me." The guy is a bit awkward. Too bad, his ex used to be awkward as hell, too. Their uncanny similarities are indeed deal-breakers. "Uhm, do you want water? You seem pretty drunk."

God, their voices are even alike. Deal-breaker #3.

"Jongin, that bastard..." Baekhyun mutters to himself, "leaving me alone at some stranger's house and selling me off to this-" Baekhyun looks around the swirling living room, "stranger."

"Stranger?" It sounds like the guy couldn't believe his own ears. He may even be angry but that's too far-fetched.

"I'm sorry," Baekhyun says as he hangs his head down, feeling it getting heavier. "You might know me because of Jongin but you're still a stranger to me."

There's silence for quite some time – as if time itself has stopped between the two of them – before the guy turns around to pick up red cups and arrange things back to their original places.

"Do you wanna go home?" The guy suddenly asks. "It's already two in the morning and the snow has been pouring a lot stronger than yesterday. It also looks like Jongin will be enjoying his night with Sehun." The guy turns around to look at him again and Baekhyun swears it's _him_. Or maybe he's just helplessly inebriated and lonely. But the guy definitely sounds hesitant when he says, "You could stay over for the night."

Honestly, it's driving Baekhyun to insanity. The last line was the exact thing his ex used to tell him when it got too late after they finish their project together and they end up cuddling on the bed.

Baekhyun blames the alcohol for misinterpreting that same line as _let's have a one night stand_ because he actually strides forward to the guy that reminds him terribly of his ex-boyfriend. When they're close enough, separated by barely several inches only, Baekhyun pulls him closer by the nape and smashes their lips together, thin lips against fuller ones. He feels the surprise from the taller guy who stiffens a little bit under his touch.

"Just one night," is the first thing Baekhyun breathes out when they part, his hand running down to the firm chest of the guy. Is the party music still playing on the background? Because why else can Baekhyun feel a heavy pounding on his fingertips?

Without speaking another word, the guy surprisingly puts his large and slightly rough palms against each of Baekhyun's cheeks, cupping his face, slanting his lips against Baekhyun's in a more passionate way, as if the kiss fills a hunger he has suppressed. Baekhyun fists the guy's shirt into his palms and pulls him even closer to maneuver them into a better angle. The guy deepens the kiss, licking Baekhyun's lower lip and the petite guy does not hesitate to open his mouth to welcome his tongue. Baekhyun's hands come around to snake around the guy's neck with desperation he didn't know he possessed.

They rush their way to a bedroom, clothes being hurriedly taken off and carelessly scattered on the floor, sweating bodies pressing against each other and neither of them cares. There's a moment where their crotches rub against each other and both of them can feel the other's hard member through the fabric of their boxers. Baekhyun may have moaned wantonly at some point.

This being a one night stand only, Baekhyun thinks there's no need to introduce each other so he skips that part even though he badly wanted to know, and allows the guy to spread his legs apart.

"Can I?"

Oh god, that voice. Baekhyun is taken back to the time he lost his virginity to his first love. It's the same line that was said by that person. He hates to admit it but no one has ever beaten Chanyeol's record on making him feel good, not only sexually. Chanyeol has been his first love, his first boyfriend, his first everything. Unfortunately, his first confusing heartbreak, too. They broke up without a proper closure and Baekhyun's not sure even until now if they have broken up at all. That's why for the past seven years, he was confused if he should feel heartbroken or not. But all the same, he felt devastated without him by his side.

Back to the present, the guy's fingers linger on the waistband of his boxers, seriously waiting for Baekhyun to tell him he can strip him.

"Please," Baekhyun replies, even lifting his hips a little bit so the guy can get him naked easily.

"I hope you won't regret this when we wake up."

Gently, the guy removes the only piece of clothing that Baekhyun is wearing. The boxers are effortlessly thrown to some unknown part of the bedroom before the guy starts nuzzling Baekhyun's cock. Baekhyun tries to hold back his moan because he knows what he sounds like when he lets himself loose and that is one embarrassing detail that only Chanyeol should know, but the guy just had to suck marks on the insides of his thighs until his lips bruise the milky skin there and turn it to a purplish color.

Then he takes Baekhyun's cock inside his mouth, his length heavy on the guy's tongue. It's like he was born to pleasure Baekhyun that he even makes the petite guy find purchase on his hair instead of the sheets, guiding Baekhyun's wrists to his head. So Baekhyun does that, grabbing strands of the guy's hair. The guy moans, the vibrations from the guy's throat sending waves of pleasure down Baekhyun's veins. One long lick up his shaft and the guy pulls away and fucking nuzzles his nose on the way to Baekhyun's entrance, making the petite guy whimper and clutch the soft strands of hair tighter.

The first kiss on Baekhyun's tight hole is sweet, chaste. But the one that followed it makes Baekhyun question his sanity, because he is honesly going crazy at how the guy freaking eats him up the same way Baekhyun had eaten his blueberry cheesecake. It's like Baekhyun is the most delicious thing in the world and he can't get enough of it. Tongue darting in and out, slicking his walls, prepping him for what sure was a larger size. But Baekhyun can only take so much.

"I want you now," Baekhyun pants.

"There's no-"

"Just- please-"

Condoms be damned. Baekhyun lifts his head a bit just in time to see this person that frustratingly looks a lot like Chanyeol strip in record time. He also finds it weird that he wears white briefs like how Chanyeol used to. Maybe all Chanyeol look-alikes wear that? The guy fishes for something around while still on top of Baekhyun, their erections brushing against each other's bare skin. The guy's hand emerges with a small bottle of clear liquid. He pops open the lid and pours a generous amount on his palm that goes straight to his own cock, carelessly lathering it with lube.

Lost in thoughts, Baekhyun is pushed upwards on the bed when the guy thrusts into him none too slowly, skin against skin.

 _Ah, even his fit is as perfect as Chanyeol's_ , Baekhyun thinks. Then he mentally slaps his cheeks because why is he thinking of his ex at a time like this? If he has decided to move on, then thinking about Chanyeol while some stranger pleasures him to Saturn and back is not the first step to do it.

They chase their climax together, faces contorting into evidences of the cloud nine they are floating on. Then Baekhyun is clenching on the guy's dick, which has noticeably become thicker while inside Baekhyun. And the pace changes into an erratic rhythm, irregular thrusts that Baekhyun meets with lifts of his hips. The guy on top comes first, emptying his load inside of Baekhyun and when it felt so good with rough palms squeezing his ass and massaging his thighs, Baekhyun follows after, spurting into his stomach without any hand jerking him off.

Also, he may have whispered Chanyeol's name when he came.

He's so tired already that he closes his eyes and almost dozes off if not for the ticklish feeling around his nipples. He opens an eye to peek and that's when he sees the guy licking the come off his stomach to his chest. Then he loses his consciousness.

_**December 11, 2015** _

Baekhyun wakes up at such an early hour of nine in the morning even though he thinks he has a hangover, judging by the aching at the back of his head and his vague memory of what has transpired last night. So it is an understatement to say that Baekhyun freaked out when he finds himself naked under the warm sheets of whoever's bedroom this is. He looks at the bedside table first, a little bit afraid to look at his left and discover that he has bedded a girl and had gotten her pregnant. There's some medicine and a glass of water on the bedside table and Baekhyun reaches out to take it, with his ass noticeably complaining.

So he bottomed last night. Nobody's getting pregnant. _Phew_ , Baekhyun sighs in relief but his lower body is still kind of a bit sore. The feeling takes him back to the morning of his first time. Suddenly, Baekhyun's heart is pounding loudly inside his chest to the point that the person next to him might think of him as an alarm and set him for a five-minute snooze. _Why does it feel like this?_

Baekhyun turns his head to take a sneak peek at the person beside him, everything in slow motion. His heart pounds louder when he sees the flawless back and a mop of raven hair which all make him feel deja vu. It can't be... perhaps...

_No, it can't be._

Whoever this person is, Baekhyun doesn't wait to find out as he starts gathering all his clothes. His boxers are on the bedroom threshold – they didn't even close the bedroom door last night? Jeez. He notices the hickeys on his thighs while wearing his boxers. There is a pair of jeans two steps from it so he picks it up, but it's too long for him; it must be the guy's jeans. He finds his own pair of jeans on the staircase – how was he even able to strip here? And his shirt is draped on the couch. He tries to remember what happened last night but his head only aches.

After getting fully dressed, Baekhyun goes to the front door and frowns at the amount of padlocks present. It seems like the owner of this house doesn't know other alternative security. How is he supposed to escape if there are all those locks? It will take time that before he even opens half of them, that guy from upstairs have woken up already. He looks outside the window and- _holy shit_ , he has never seen so much snow in his life. The heater in this house must be incredible.

Baekhyun goes to the kitchen and searches for an exit and he finds a door with only a couple of locks that he unlatches easily. He pushes it open but it won't move, like it's stuck or something. He pushes harder and that's when he sees the pile of snow that crumbled down from the glass which is half of the door's height. That's a lot of snow out there. He goes back to the front door and tries to shake the door with its knob and after a few seconds, this crazy alarm goes off, putting Baekhyun into panic mode. He thought the house had an out-dated security system!

He decides to surrender, mentally willing the blaring alarm to go silent but it doesn't. Baekhyun goes back upstairs to wake that man up and just ask him to let him go home because, uhm, he has an urgent meeting to attend to at the university. Right. He can pretend he's still studying with the childlike face he has. It will also be a reasonable excuse for them not to be attached after this one night stand.

 

So that's how he finds himself kneeling on the bed, carefully poking this giant lump of limbs under the sheets, doubting if he should wake him up or not.

"Hey, mister," he calls out. He's also wondering how he can't recall the face of this man. It's really weird how all he can think about is his ex-boyfriend's face, but Baekhyun supposes he's still at some certain phase of moving on. After seven years...

As Baekhyun was contemplating about his status of moving on, he doesn't notice the arm that reaches out for him and drags him down. The next thing he knows, there are arms embracing him and that the bare chest in front of him is weirdly breathing deeply. What, is this guy trying to inhale him or something?

"Uhm, I'm sorry to wake you- uhmf-" he's suddenly forced to kiss the chest of this man as the latter pulls him tighter into the cuddle.

Baekhyun's eyebrows furrow in frustration even though the idea of morning sex sort of excites him. But who does this guy think he is? Does Baekhyun look like a teddy bear that much that this stranger will just cuddle him nicely like this? He's even putting his leg over Baekhyun's waist. Left with no other choice, the petite guy is forced to take matters into his hands.

"Get off," he grunts his frustration out while pushing the man away from him with so much force that the man rolls down the bed. But Baekhyun's face reveals his horror when he sees just who exactly he spent the night with because– "P-Park?!"

Right there on the floor, scratching his head and yawning while being delectable with no clothes on but only white sheets to cover his gloriousness, is Park Chanyeol. Baekhyun's ex-boyfriend.

So it wasn't all inebriated hallucinations last night, huh... He wasn't a Chanyeol look-alike but the real deal himself now blinking at Baekhyun.

And they fucked last night.

_**December 01, 2007** _

_Baekhyun had known Chanyeol for good two years due to them being classmates before the latter has asked him to be his boyfriend. Like some puppy love stories, theirs blossomed from being seated next to each other in class and then one extemporaneous speech after, Chanyeol hugged Baekhyun. It was a spur-of-the-moment decision. Maybe it was of the hype that he had delivered his speech successfully and was applauded by his classmates, but it still led to Baekhyun blushing._

_The both of them couldn't see the issue of being gay or whatever, because for them, it's only about the sensations they had felt when they sat beside each other or accidentally brushing one wrist against a forearm under the table. Just like that, their feelings developed. On a December night, Chanyeol asked Baekhyun to be his boyfriend and it all started there._

_**December 10, 2015** _

Seven years after their break-up and Baekhyun finds himself in a very compromising situation. As it turns out, the snow on the front door is just as thick as it is on the back door that even Chanyeol can't push it open. _It can't be_ , Baekhyun is about to fucking break down and start crying when Chanyeol left him alone to take a shower. He doesn't want to be stuck with that guy, of all people. He quickly dials the number of the person who he blames responsible for all of this.

"Jongin, get me out of here," Baekhyun whines into his cell phone. From the other line, he can hear muffled chuckles that are possibly from Sehun.

"Stop it, Hunnie," Jongin says with a hint of laughter in his voice, too. His voice becomes clearer when he says, "There's nothing we can do about it, hyung. In case you haven't heard the news, this is record-breaking heavy snowfall for decades, past 40 inches thick–" there's some muttering then a far away, "I know you're thick, too, Hunnie, I've felt it," which makes Baekhyun want to puke. "I mean, 40 inches thick layer of snow."

Baekhyun continues to whine into the phone because at least Chanyeol isn't around to witness this. "Jongin, I thought I'm your favest hyung! Why have you forsaken me?"

"Oh yeah, Chanyeol hyung is also nice. Sehun and I thought you two would get along together, thus the set up. He's also trying to get over someone, just like you, hyung," Jongin chuckles at that, blissfully ignorant of Baekhyun's predicament.

"Exactly why I didn't want to stay here. I don't like him so we're not going to get along together," Baekhyun cries out.

"Just give him a chance," Jongin's voice is starting to sound distant. Baekhyun thinks about it. Seriously. But he can't risk his heart getting broken by the same person for the fifth time again- or will it be sixth already?

"I don't wanna! Besides, isn't Sehun a _chaebol_? Make him get me out of here with a bulldozer or a helicopter- just, whatever. Please, Jong-” But he stops immediately when he hears Jongin groaning Sehun's name and, _what the fuck_? His ears don't want to hear that! He looks at his phone, disgusted, before throwing the device away.

»»» 

Baekhyun is currently crouched against the wooden front door, banging his head and hoping for some miracle in December to happen as an exchange for all the brain cells he has sacrificed. "Why am I suffering like this," he mutters to himself like a mantra.

Chanyeol emerges from upstairs with his fringes sticking to his forehead. How he wanted to have been with Chanyeol in that shower – nope, it cannot be. Baekhyun doesn't let his gaze linger and continues banging his forehead against the door. He can hear the harsh whistling of the wind from outside since he's trying to focus on anything that's not Chanyeol.

"Breakfast?" Chanyeol asks while he walks to the kitchen. The tall guy doesn't even look at Baekhyun when he offered – so much for sincerity.

Baekhyun was adamant in staying like that for the rest of the day but his stomach complains along with his forehead, and there's this really inviting scent wafting from the kitchen, so...

 

It was the smell of bacon and eggs, Baekhyun swears, that led him to sitting on the dining table and now eating breakfast with Chanyeol. There's no other reason. Besides, it looks like Chanyeol has cooked too much. Even if he does have an ogre's appetite, the food he prepared is still enough for two ogres.

Baekhyun can just ignore this guy for the rest of his unfortunate stay in this house, pretend that he's alone or something.

That should be easy.

 

Except it's _not_.

Because Chanyeol eats like a pig, munching on his breakfast noisily, and drinks like a fish, making sure to sip from his mug with sound effects. Baekhyun can't even remember the guy being like this before, so he glares at Chanyeol, hoping it's enough of a message to tell him to have manners.

And Chanyeol seems to have a retort regarding his manners. "I can't stand the silence. I'll eat as loudly as I want."

Baekhyun rolls his eyes and continues eating. He has almost forgotten how much he likes Chanyeol's cooking and that never changed.

Suddenly, Chanyeol clears his throat. "Do you know how much a polar bear weighs?"

"What?" Baekhyun asks not because he's curious but because he's confused. Why is Chanyeol talking to him like this?

Chanyeol cracks a smile. "Enough to break the ice," he says as he stares at Baekhyun through his lashes, the smile turning into a grin before it becomes a series of chuckles at his own joke. The teasing is evident in his voice, almost the same tone he used to have when they were still going out but more held back. He's looking at Baekhyun like he's waiting for the smaller guy to laugh along with him but Baekhyun just shakes his head. Again, _why is Chanyeol talking to him like this?_

"Pathetic."

With just one word, Baekhyun successfully ruins what was going to be a friendly mood and commends himself inside his head for it. He sort of feels bad a few seconds later, though, and subsequently regrets it the moment Chanyeol _really_ shuts up. The room is just filled with the sound of the wind howling from the outside.

"Okay, let me try again," Chanyeol sighs. "Hi, Baek. How have you been?"

Baekhyun channels all of his annoyance in his facial expression when he looks at Chanyeol this time. "Seriously?"

"What? Do you really want to spend the rest of your time here not talking? Can you do that?" Chanyeol challenges with a raise of his brow.

Baekhyun rolls his eyes. "Then watch me."

Because there is no way that Baekhyun will allow himself to get comfortable with Chanyeol again.

Not anymore.

_**June 01, 2008** _

_Baekhyun prepared lunch boxes for their half-year anniversary. It seemed like only yesterday when Chanyeol asked him out to be his boyfriend and they're already celebrating their sixth month now._

_Time flew so fast when he's so happy by Chanyeol's side._

_He took his cellphone out and dialed Chanyeol. There was no answer even after Baekhyun's fourth missed call._ Maybe he's busy _, Baekhyun reasoned out to himself. After a few minutes, his hunger couldn't take it any longer and he starts eating his lunch._

_Then Chanyeol called, asking him why he was calling a while ago and was there anything important he wanted to say because he's busy right now. One of his Chem classmates asked him about their previous experiment so he wasn't able to answer the calls._

_Baekhyun swallowed the forming lump in his throat. So he was the only one who thought that half-year anniversaries are important and it was trivial for Chanyeol. He could let this slide. After all, Chanyeol had his reasons. And half-year anniversaries weren't that important either, Baekhyun realized after._

_"It's fine, Yeol." Baekhyun murmured. "Let's just meet later?"_

_"Later? Ah, sorry, Baek, I have to tutor Seulgi about our latest English exercise. Maybe we can meet tomorrow?"_

_Baekhyun had his fist clenched on his uniform pants when he agreed and hang up. He couldn't finish the rest of his lunch anymore.  
_

_**December 10, 2015** _

There's a digital clock hanging on the wall above the flat screen TV and it's clear to Baekhyun that the minute digits change every hour – or at least that's how it feels for him.

11:09.

It's honestly killing Baekhyun how every minute passes and he's slowly caving in to the desire to talk with _just any other human being_ , that's unfortunately his ex-boyfriend in this case. Even though they're sitting on different couches, the distance is still not enough.

11:10. How time flies so slow when you want it to speed up.

He looks at the window and the snow-covered neighborhood that surrounds them. When is this snowstorm going to stop? A pile of snow falling down from the roof to a car answers his question.

"Oh, it's already 11:11. How time flies," Chanyeol says dryly.

Baekhyun quickly bows his head with eyes closed and mutters repeatedly, _please make me go home, please_.

Chanyeol chuckles at the sight. "You still haven't changed, huh."

Baekhyun only glares at him.

"You're not supposed to say your wish out loud or else it won't come true."

Baekhyun's eyes go wide when he realizes that he _did_ say his wish out loud. He was the one who taught that to Chanyeol, how could he forget the rules?

Chanyeol suddenly stands up and goes to the kitchen. He returns with one pack of beer on each hand. "Drink up. I think you need to loosen up a little."

There's no hesitation when Baekhyun picks up a can. He's determined not to repeat the previous night's accident but he also knows that he needs to loosen up _just a little bit_.

Silence ensues between them, only the sound of gulping their drinks can be heard. Then the silence gets broken. "Don't you wanna play catch up with me?" It's Chanyeol's voice.

"Play? Haven't you had enough from playing with me? What's there to catch up, anyway? I don't care about what happened to you." There's nothing that gives away anything, but they both know what those sentences are — lies.

Is it already after eight cans? Probably. Baekhyun definitely cannot handle his alcohol anymore. Or else why is he spouting nonsense?

Chanyeol seems to have been taken by surprise at the sudden outburst. "Baek-"

"You know what," Baekhyun interrupts before he takes another swig of beer, surprisingly finishing it with an 'aaahh', "you're right. We should play. Catching up with each other."

Chanyeol's eyes seem to have brightened up. "My first question is-"

"I don't need your bullshit, Yeol. I'll ask you what I want to know."

"Then what do you wanna know?"

Baekhyun pretends to think about it, putting his index finger and thumb under his chin. "Like, what's your shoe size?"

"Twenty-nine," Chanyeol answers quickly. "What about you?"

"Three sizes smaller."

"You're so proportionally small and it's so cute."

"Shut up." But even when Baekhyun says this, his ears still redden almost immediately.

"What else do you want to know?"

A long pause. Baekhyun wants to know a lot of things — if he had other relationships in the past, if he had turned straight, what happened in those years they weren't together... But he knows that it's not his business anymore and he shouldn't poke his nose on other people's business.

"Uhm. Did you have pets?" It is something whisked out of the blue.

Chanyeol's chuckles. "Ah, safe question. I like pets. And I tried having one at home, but I'm allergic."

"Right."

Why did he have to ask that? Baekhyun remembers the time when they were planning for their future and told Chanyeol he wanted puppies instead of kids because children would be messy and out of control when they grow up and Baekhyun didn't really want all that baggage of responsibility, meanwhile dogs can be tied when they get out of hand.

_"But I think we can handle our pets well, and train them not to be as messy as children would be," Baekhyun had said. When he noticed Chanyeol's sad face, he learned that Chanyeol was actually allergic to any pet._

_Baekhyun had consoled him with a, "then it would be just the two of us, more time for-"_

_"Making love?" Chanyeol had finished with a question, grinning. Baekhyun grinned back at him._

"What about you, Baek? Did you have pets after you left Korea?" Chanyeol's voice pulls him away from his thoughts. There's an underlying meaning behind his tone. _After you left me?_ is left unsaid.

A pet isn’t a safe topic as what Baekhyun thought it is. Maybe this is going to be a more serious conversation than what he expected it to be.

Baekhyun opens another can of beer when he finished the other one. He wants the alcohol to do the talking so he takes a huge gulp before answering. "I actually got two puppies and took care of them until they died. So, yes, I got pets... after we broke up."

"Is that why you left me?" Baekhyun peers at Chanyeol who is sporting an expressionless face. Chanyeol adds, "For pets?"

"We both know that's not true, Yeol."

"Then why did you leave me?"

"Have you asked that to yourself?

"I thought I did everything, Baek. But I just woke up and everyone tells me you weren't in the country anymore. I'm the last one who knew you left."

Baekhyun empties another can of beer, and another, stalling.

"I didn't think you'd care."

"You didn't think I'd care?" Chanyeol's voice is rising at the ridiculous thought; he's getting hysterical.

"Yes!" Baekhyun yells, throwing the empty can of beer into the floor. "Because I didn't feel like I was your boyfriend anymore! It didn't feel like you wanted to be with me anymore. You were kissed by another girl. And I know I wasn't your priority, we didn't even make it public, but you didn't have to make it so obvious so that every plan we had will be rearranged until we didn't go to any dates at all. You just- you just faded away from me..."

Baekhyun doesn't notice that he has started crying already. And when tears dropped from his chin to his clenched hands on his lap, he starts bawling his eyes out, a stream of tears rolling down his cheek.

Chanyeol is beside him in a second, immediately embracing him. "I'm so sorry, Baek. But let me explain myself. Give me another shot. I don't wanna lose you again."

_**July 04, 2008** _

__  
It's been one straight week since the last time Baekhyun and Chanyeol went home together.

_Baekhyun's staying at an out-campus dorm that's on the way to Chanyeol's house so they used to go home together every afternoon. Recently, however, Chanyeol had been too busy to be with him even during lunch breaks. Then after their periodical examinations, Ms. Kwon always asked Chanyeol to help her check papers. It had always been Chanyeol._

_Baekhyun heard rumors about Ms. Kwon favoring his boyfriend out of all her students because she actually liked him. But they were all just rumors, anyway, Baekhyun wouldn't let himself be swayed with such._

_But he started to question the rumors as Chanyeol said he was helping Ms. Kwon correct quizzes now. It had been days since their exams. They're checking the papers even until now?_

_Chanyeol said he'll make it up to Baekhyun._

_But the cycle just repeated itself anyway.  
_

_**December 10, 2015** _

"But you still left me that time, Baek..." Chanyeol says into his neck while Baekhyun is barely paying him attention. He's concentrated on swallowing the lump on his throat first.

Is he turning into a lightweight now? All he drank was like... five, six... eleven? cans of beer. Oh. He also drank it on an empty stomach. _Oh._

It's only been a few minutes since Chanyeol has taken him into his embrace and every time Baekhyun tries to pull away and rush to the bathroom, Chanyeol just tightens his hold on him.

"Baek, how can I show you how sorry I am?"

Baekhyun throws up on the pristine white shirt of Chanyeol.

His head clears up after retching and his eyes widen when he realizes who he's face to face with.

"Oh, God, I'm sorry–"

"It's okay–"

"No, I'll wash it."

"Seriously, Baek, I deserve this. I'll wash it myself. This doesn't even begin how sorry I am."

"No, you'll just hold it over my head and use it for me to forgive you and– just strip and let me wash it, okay?"

Chanyeol takes his shirt off right then, careful not to have contact with Baekhyun's puke on his shirt but it's quite impossible. His hair catches some vomit on it and Baekhyun groans, as if he's the one with puke on his hair.

"I'm so sorry, Yeol," Baekhyun apologizes profusely.

"Baek, it's okay. I'll just wash this off me and just put the shirt–"

"No, I'll wash this."

"I told you, it's–"

Baekhyun won't hear any of it. He grabs the shirt out of Chanyeol's hand and runs to where he thinks the laundry room is and shouts, "I'll wash your shirt and you take a bath and that's final."

 

The struggle when he finally reaches the laundry room is that there's a bee hovering on the slightly opened window of the laundry room. Do bees even exist in winter? Don't they hibernate or something? Snow is still pouring outside; the wind still is still strong, filling the small room with a cool breeze.

Baekhyun notices the bee first because he's had a bad experience with bees before that it's almost second nature for him to spot it _anywhere_ and avoid it. However, his mission is to wash this shirt, so he braves himself as he carefully steps inside the room with eyes looking out for the bee. Fortunately, it just continues hovering over the window.

Baekhyun looks at the washing machine and contemplates using it since it's just for one shirt. He could hand wash this piece of clothing right away but he's worried that the stain and stench might remain. Why did he have to throw up on Chanyeol anyway?

He's resolute to use the washing machine. He puts the shirt into the washer before grabbing the detergent and pouring a little amount of the powder into the water when–

The bee flies past his face and Baekhyun panics as he screams and drops the entire pack of detergent into the water and _shit, shit, shit._

First things first, he must get rid of the bee, Baekhyun decides. He looks up to search for the little fucker but it turns out that it has flown out the window already and into the snow, maybe it's off to hibernation now if it can survive the harsh winds. 

Exhaling in relief, he proceeds to his next problem, getting the powder container from the water. The contents have completely spilled out into the water and now he has just one shirt in the washer with a medium-pack detergent emptied into it.

"Fuck, Baek," he mutters to himself, "could you even make this worse?"

It is a rhetorical question, of course. But then it is answered when Baekhyun subconsciously leans on the washing machine and places his hand on the buttons. The washing machine whirs into life.

"Holy fuck, shit." Baekhyun starts to panic. "What did you do this time? You didn't have to make things worse, you idiot."

Bubbles start to fill the washer to the brim until it overflows. It's infinitely producing bubbles.

"Baek, is everything–" Chanyeol's jaw drops as he takes in the entire laundry room and Baekhyun's stomach drops at the look on Chanyeol's face. Bubbles have drowned Baekhyun to his knees and the look that he gets from the latter is a mix of guilt, embarrassment, and devastation. He steps forward to help.

"Stop, just stay there," Baekhyun warns.

"Baek, let me help you out."

Chanyeol reaches for the washing machine controls but Baekhyun stubbornly comes between Chanyeol and the washing machine, flailing his arms in front of the taller guy, blocking him like they're playing basketball and Baekhyun is on defense mode.

"Yeol, I'll handle this myself." Baekhyun continues to flail his arm.

"Shut up, Baek, and let me just–"

One wrong move and Baekhyun successfully knocks Chanyeol out with the back of his hand. It hits the taller guy on the forehead and he loses his balance, stumbling backwards.

Baekhyun turns around to find Chanyeol lying down on a sea of bubbles and he forgets about everything. He kneels down beside Chanyeol and checks his heartbeat first. _He's still alive_ , Baekhyun assures himself.

He pats the cheek of Chanyeol to wake him up. Up close, he notices that the taller guy's face is still the same from how he remembered it, from what he has memorized. "Yeol... Chanyeol," he calls out his name repeatedly.

"You still care for me," Chanyeol states even if his eyes are still closed.

Baekhyun catches himself in the middle of brushing Chanyeol's fringe away from his forehead and retreats his hands to himself.

"I don't," Baekhyun argues weakly.

He stands up and goes back to the washing machine that's unfortunately buried under the bubbles now. He blindly searches for the power button or something to make the washer stop but it stops even before he can press a button.

Baekhyun is taken by surprise when a hand covers his own hand and he turns around to Chanyeol towering before him, trapping him. He's not sure if he can keep his loud heartbeat to himself. The moment he gazes into Chanyeol's eyes is the moment he knows shit is getting serious.

"Baek," Chanyeol calls out in the same way he did back in high school. Back in the days when they were so in love with each other that every word is a confession of affection. Back in the times when all Baekhyun can see was him and Chanyeol forever–

"Stop." The word comes out like a sob without tears. He places a hand on Chanyeol's chest to push the guy away but the taller guy's hand covers it and he can feel the pounding under Chanyeol's skin. He's not sure whose is louder but one thing is for sure, his resolve almost crumbles.

Which sends alarms ringing inside his head. He needs to escape, fast, because if he doesn't, he might break down right there while clutching Chanyeol's shirt. He pushes Chanyeol away from him and walks out of the laundry room.

He leaves behind a trail of bubbles and he almost doesn't care about the mess he made out of the house and of himself. Almost. But he's so embarrassed right now, he doesn't know if he can muster the face to look at Chanyeol again.

When Baekhyun is in the middle of the living room, everything turns black.

_**August 22, 2008** _

__  
There was one time when Chanyeol told him he can't make it to their date on time because he's going to explain math formulas to his classmate.

_Baekhyun waited until he didn't notice that the sun has already set. Jongdae, his classmate, called him out if he wasn't going home yet, and that's when he noticed that it really was late already. He waved goodbye to Jongdae before checking his phone to find it with no messages or calls like he expected._

_He walked to Chanyeol's classroom and found him sitting maybe a little too close with a girl._

_"Yeol-ah, what about this part here?" The girl shoved her boobs on Chanyeol's arm to which the latter responded to by sitting farther away._

_"We've been through that a dozen of times already. You still don't get it?" Baekhyun heard Chanyeol holding back his frustration. He knew his boyfriend is polite and nice, a friend to everyone, but he also knew these traits could make people take advantage of him._

_The girl shook her head and Baekhyun cringed at her try-hard aegyo._

_Maybe Chanyeol felt him staring because he looked back and their eyes met. He seemed surprised but he excused himself from the girl anyway. "Review this again and again, okay?"_

_"Baek, what are you still doing here?"_

_"Yeol, I'm still your boyfriend, right?" Baekhyun almost cringed at how he sounds. It made him think he's no different from that girl._

_"What?" Chanyeol was confused but he must have seen Baekhyun's face filled with doubt and insecurities that he took the petite guy into his arms right away. "Of course you are," he had whispered into Baekhyun's hair, unsure of why his boyfriend was feeling like this, but then he remembered all the dates he had taken for granted just to be someone else's tutor or assistant, anything but a good boyfriend to Baekhyun. When Baekhyun whimpered under his touch, he chased the pain away with, "I'm so sorry for making you feel this way, Baek. I'll make up for all the dates I've missed."_

_"That girl was obviously flirting with you."_

_"Aww, don't worry, Baek. You're my only one."_

_Baekhyun could only wrap his arms around Chanyeol's waist, nodding against his boyfriend's chest. He'd have to trust him again this time._

_He'd have to put his heart on the line again._

__‘I'll make up for all the dates I've missed.’ __

_That's what Chanyeol had always said.  
_

_**December 10, 2015** _

It turns out that a blackout has hit Chanyeol's area, that's why the electricity in the entire neighborhood went off. Maybe it has something to do with the snowstorm, but whatever it is, it's still a bad time. The heater has been cut off and it's beginning to get cold inside the house.

Chanyeol has brought Baekhyun up to change into warmer clothes, towelling the bubbles off their bodies. The sweaters are all too big on Baekhyun and the petite guy doesn't want to wear anything that is Chanyeol's (he doesn't need any more reason to make his heart beat faster), but it's not like his alternative option is any better.

"My clothes or freeze to death, your choice," Chanyeol snaps at him after his third refusal to put on a pullover.

So Baekhyun is forced to wear one of his ex-boyfriend's sweaters again. It smells like him – like a home Baekhyun can return to, maybe – but Baekhyun knows it's only wishful thinking.

A flashback to their first Christmas together as boyfriends rushes into his mind in a vignette with a mellow music playing in his memories. They spent the holidays together because Chanyeol claimed his family didn't celebrate such occasions. Exchanging gifts ended with a new sweater Chanyeol gave to Baekhyun because the petite boy has whined about getting cold easily while Chanyeol has told him that, " _that's why God gave me to you, so I can act as your heater._ " It made Baekhyun blush then, and it's making him blush right now, under thick sheets of blankets on Chanyeol's bed, wearing Chanyeol's sweater. The only good thing about this blackout is that it hides the blush creeping on Baekhyun's cheek and slowly spreading to his neck.

Their backs are facing each other, a 38th Parallel bordering between them. It's almost suffocating how they are close like this, on the same bed, but being on opposite poles. A war may ensue if the line is breached.

But Baekhyun gets cold easily, even under the layers of blankets and a sweater that's making him hot all over his body. It's like the ice from the December breeze is creeping under his skin. It doesn't take long after that he's curled on his side like a fetus and his teeth start chattering audibly.

Chanyeol hears it but he doesn't say anything about it. Instead, he scoots closer to Baekhyun and wraps his arms around the waist of Baekhyun's curled figure, pressing Baekhyun's back against his chest.

When Baekhyun feels lanky arms around him, his surprise comes out as a gasp. He squirms away but it's the drinking session all over again — the more he tries to escape from this tall man's grasp, the tighter Chanyeol holds him.

Baekhyun immediately feels Chanyeol's warmth seep into his own skin, and even making his cheeks red. Good thing there's a blackout.

"Get off me and go to sleep, please," he says weakly.

"Baek, do you think I can sleep when you're—"

"Ahh!" Baekhyun interrupts him, not wanting to hear the rest of his sentence. He huffs in frustration. "Why are you doing this?"

"I don't want you to get cold." Even if it was only a whisper, Chanyeol's voice is still clearly heard because he's so near Baekhyun's ear that even his exhale tickles the petite guy. "Without me holding you, you'll probably be freezing. Right?"

"No," Baekhyun mutters. "I mean, why are you doing... all this? It's like..."

Baekhyun doesn't finish his sentence and leaves the silence hanging over them.

Chanyeol's lips brush against his nape, moving against Baekhyun's skin when he whispers back, "Do you honestly not know why I'm doing all this?"

Baekhyun shakes his head with a heart that's pounding hard against his chest. Realizing that Chanyeol probably can't see him in the dark, he begins to speak a syllable but it drowns when—

"We're on the same bed, Baek. Do you honestly think i can sleep right now when you're on _my_ bed with _me_?"

"Wh-what do you mean?" Baekhyun asks in a small voice. He actually has the tiniest bit of idea of what Chanyeol is trying to say but he's trying to deny that possibility.

But Chanyeol is rubbing his nose on Baekhyun's nape, saying things that make Baekhyun's heart squeeze and thud faster at the same time. "I wanna hold you and do things, something like that. You don't have any idea how much I've missed you."

 _Badump. Badump. Badump_ , says Baekhyun's heart as it continues to accelerate into a dangerous speed. "W-why?"

"Isn't it obvious?" Chanyeol's light chuckle is of regrets from the past years he failed to find Baekhyun again. "It's because I'm still in love with you, Baek."

The syllable that lodged itself in Baekhyun's throat makes its way to his heart, puncturing the organ until he can't breathe. Baekhyun thinks he may throw up again, this time on Chanyeol's bed sheet.

How can Chanyeol just blurt those words out like that?

Plump lips are pressed on Baekhyun's nape, before Chanyeol turns him around to lie on his back and he hovers on top of him.

A kiss on Baekhyun's protruding collarbone, and another one on the sensitive skin under his jaw.

A gentle kiss on his chin that makes Baekhyun surrender his heart again. The risk of giving up your heart to someone. Be so vulnerable.

A chaste one on the lips that lights up the world. If Baekhyun and Chanyeol aren't so driven with their passion, trying to compensate for the lost years, they would have noticed the windows in their neighborhood lighting up simultaneously. The lamp by the bedside flickers into life, illuminating Chanyeol's face as Baekhyun watches him with wide eyes. It's their first kiss all over again.

_Baekhyun sat on the teacher's table with crossed legs. Chanyeol, sitting on the first seat of the first column, told him to get down already but he wouldn't listen, saying that it's detention anyway so they could do anything while the teacher was out. When Chanyeol asked him again, he pouted._

_So the younger guy, and apparently the more mature of the two, strode over to where Baekhyun sat and it literally seemed like the whole world stopped, because Baekhyun's breathing has also stopped, because watching the look on Chanyeol's face was breath-taking, just—_

_Chanyeol grabbed Baekhyun's lapel and maybe it was a bit harsh but the kiss he got was just the opposite — so soft, tender._

_Baekhyun's eyes were wide because this was his first kiss. In his entire life, this was his first kiss and he's slightly panicking because now he should marry Chanyeol because how dare he steal his first kiss like this and his eyes were still open with shock while Chanyeol's were closed the moment their lips met._

_Out of breath, Chanyeol parted._

_"Now get down, or you won't get more of that," Chanyeol had smirked, tapping Baekhyun's nose. "And also, close your eyes when we kiss next time, okay?"_

Such tender lips...

Chanyeol parts and Baekhyun's breath is still taken away by this man on top of him, the yellowish light of the lamp casting shadows on his face, emphasizing the slight bump of his nose and the shape of his eyes and Baekhyun should stop memorizing his features already.

"Have you opened your eyes all those times we kissed in the past?"

Baekhyun blushes, turns his head to the side to avoid Chanyeol's gaze. "N-n-no."

The heater starts running again, bringing warmth into the room that seems pretty much useless considering how hot the both of them are right now. Chanyeol leans closer, his fingers starting to play with the hem on the sweater Baekhyun is wearing.

"Y-you can take it off," Baekhyun says while he continues avoiding Chanyeol's gaze, "for me."

Chanyeol buries his head on the crook of Baekhyun's neck, groaning. His hands lift the sweater off Baekhyun's torso just to bunch it up on his chest, exploring the skin under his palm. One of his index fingers finds Baekhyun's nipple and as he plays with it, Baekhyun moans.

"Baek, this is so unfair," Chanyeol lets out in a long exhale. He rants, "Do you know just how damn seductive you are right now and you're literally glowing with this light; we should keep doing it here with this setting, making love with this lamp beside us — ugh, what am I saying — but really, you're just so, so beautiful, I swear."

 _I should be the one saying that to you, Yeol_ , Baekhyun thinks but doesn't say out loud. Instead, he just whimpers and brings his hands to card through Chanyeol's hair when they're passionately kissing each other already. Baekhyun's hands travel down to Chanyeol's firm chest and he can feel the latter's heart thumping as loud as his, or maybe even louder, he's not so sure.

"This is what you do to me," Chanyeol says, out of breath. "Thought you should know." Chanyeol rubs his hard length on Baekhyun's and the sensation sends the both of them on the edge. It's too much.

Baekhyun is the one to push Chanyeol away so he is lying down on his back before the petite guy pulls down Chanyeol's pajama pants, the pulsing cock springing makes Baekhyun gulp the ghost of a lump that stuck itself on his throat.

He stands up from the bed, back facing Chanyeol and — to be honest — there is a moment there when Chanyeol thinks he is going to get blue balls because that is just the worst punishment Baekhyun can give him which he thought he deserves for just 75%. But Baekhyun turns his head slightly to face Chanyeol and gives him a small smile, innocent but with a hint of teasing. He lifts the hem of the sweater slowly, this time definitely teasing, and Chanyeol _feels_ his dick twitching.

When the sweater is discarded and forgotten on the floor, Baekhyun runs a hand on his arm — yes, very arousing. He slowly pulls down his own pajama pants, and Chanyeol wants to eat that ass when it's raised up in the air. Baekhyun turns around, completely naked and hard and flushed red with the whole body blush.

"Where the fuck did you learn that," Chanyeol states, still out of breath. It's a wonder he hasn't come yet.

Baekhyun bites his lower lip and when he thinks that is an action to show his insecurity, all it does is just to arouse Chanyeol more, making his cock grow to its fullest.

"Baek, come here."

Baekhyun doesn't just _come there_ , he crawls his way on top of Chanyeol, stopping to give kisses all over his torso that gives the message how much he adores the taller guy. He licks his way up to Chanyeol's lips, making out while their hard dicks rub against each other.

"Y-yeol, wait," Baekhyun pants. "I can't take it anymore."

He reaches out for the bottle of lube in the bedside drawer and only notices now that it's strawberry-flavored. He pours some of the clear substance into his fingers and Chanyeol's eyes widen.

Is Baekhyun going to top?

The fingers with the generous amount of lube goes into Baekhyun's ass and Chanyeol watches as Baekhyun stretches himself, gasping Chanyeol's name.

"Ahh- Chanyeol-ah."

When Baekhyun deems the prepping is enough, he wraps his fingers around Chanyeol's dick, jerks it a bit, before he slides down on it with a moan. It's different when he's sober now, because he can really feel the fullness.

"Baek, you're still so tight."

"Ngh- no. Y-you're just so big."

Even when he says it like that – like he can't handle Chanyeol's size – Baekhyun still gyrates his hips as an effort to bury Chanyeol deeper inside him, his own cock splattering a mess of precum on Chanyeol's abs. A huge, calloused hand settles on Baekhyun's waist, and another one tweaking his nipple.

Baekhyun withdraws until only the tip of Chanyeol's cock is inside him, his hole clenching around almost nothing yet it's still so arousing and he doesn't even know why. He slams himself down abruptly — his ass cheeks are met with Chanyeol's balls and his own dick is slapped on Chanyeol's tightening stomach. Chanyeol can feel the beginnings of numb legs but he hardly cares.

Baekhyun does nothing else but go with the flow, continues dragging himself up and dropping down, shots of pleasure traveling into every nerve of his body when Chanyeol hits him right on the spot — "Fuck, right there, Yeol," — until they're reduced to nothing but a mess of moans and pants and grunts and sweat, Baekhyun's lips sinfully darting out to wet his chapped lips, and Chanyeol notices this just like how he notices all the small things Baekhyun does. Chanyeol meets him upwards, wetting Baekhyun's lips for him once again, kissing senselessly until Baekhyun clenches around him and comes on their stomachs. Chanyeol thrusts up thrice and is sent to heaven and back, biting Baekhyun's neck to muffle his moan as he comes inside of Baekhyun. The bite has left a bruise.

Chanyeol collapses back on the bed, taking Baekhyun along him with an embrace around his waist. He grabs the nearest piece of clothing to wipe them, and it happens to be the sweater Baekhyun wore.

"Are you still cold?" Chanyeol asks as he rubs his palms on Baekhyun's back to give him warmth.

Baekhyun hums and shakes his head. But Chanyeol still reverses them so Baekhyun's lying on his back now, and Chanyeol gives him butterfly kisses as he intertwines their hands. The ice that was on Baekhyun's hand seems to have thawed.

"I'll be your blanket. Just don't expect me to forget you easily after this," Chanyeol tells him.

_**December 11, 2015** _

Baekhyun wakes up the next morning, snuggled close to Chanyeol's chest, Chanyeol's arm his pillow and Chanyeol's leg a strip of blanket on his waist. He finds himself thinking about the day ahead — another breakfast with Chanyeol but he'll try harder to open up a conversation now. Maybe they should watch a sappy romance movie and cry together and wipe each other's tears? He wants to do lovey-dovey things with Chanyeol now that he has faith that the guy wouldn't hurt him anymore. Hmm, can they go to a date today?

Slowly, he unwraps himself from Chanyeol's embrace and thankfully, the taller guy is a heavy sleeper that he just lies sprawled on the bed after Baekhyun goes out of the room.

Baekhyun rummages Chanyeol's closet as silently as he can to borrow another sweater because the one from last night got... dirty.

There's a white flannel button down and he gets it under a pile of t-shirts. He contemplates borrowing a pair of boxers from Chanyeol, too, blushing at the thought, but the button down falls down enough to cover his privates so he doesn't bother anymore. He roams around the house with nothing but that single clothing covering him.

 

Out of a whim, he decides to prepare breakfast even if he's inexperienced with that department. Cooking? He does it like a virgin.

He cracks three eggs into a bowl and whisks it immediately, doubting if a shell got included or... The fire is high when he pours the egg into the pan and before he is able to flip the whole thing, or at least fold it into half in his case, some parts already turned brown. Panicking, he removes the frying pan from the stove and plates it with the brownish side hidden from view.

There's a ready-made pancake mix in one of the cabinets so he prepares that, too, pouring milk into the mixture. When he is mixing the batter, warm hands slide into his waist from behind.

Chanyeol's head is perched on his shoulder, telling him how nice it would be if they actually lived together and if Baekhyun's here not only because of the snowstorm that kept them in.

"Can you check the door if it can be opened already?" Baekhyun asks.

It takes a while before Chanyeol replies and only after taking a deep breath. "Will you..." Baekhyun can feel something pounding behind his lungs. "...still stay even if the snowstorm has stopped?"

Evading the question seems to be the easier thing for Baekhyun to do.

"I actually don't know how to cook pancakes so would you mind doing this?"

Chanyeol dips a finger into the batter and tastes it, letting the mixture leave a flavor on his tongue. "Yeah, too much milk. I should probably do the cooking."

Baekhyun only grins sheepishly before slipping away from Chanyeol's arms. He walks silently towards the front door and pushes it experimentally.

The door opens, dragging about six to nine inches of snow with it. It is considerably thinner and maybe the snowstorm did stop already last night. The door also presents him a chance to escape.

Should he up and leave?

It takes a moment of hesitation, getting clouded with doubt.

"Breakfast is ready!" He hears Chanyeol call from the kitchen and he thinks... _just a second time_.

Baekhyun closes the door softly; his feet leading him back to the kitchen.

»»» 

They sit across each other and Baekhyun steals glances at Chanyeol who is eating with a big grin on his face.

"Your eggs are overcooked, you know."

"It's the fault of your stove actually, heating the pan to a hundred degrees Celsius or something," Baekhyun mutters.

"You can adjust tha— aw!" Chanyeol spits the stuff in his mouth and finds out the culprit. "An eggshell?" He looks at Baekhyun who is staring furiously at the eggs on his own plate, getting redder by the second.

"Baekhyun."

"Uh..."

"Do you know how to crack eggs?"

"Of c-course, I do!" Baekhyun looks at Chanyeol even though it's so obvious that he's embarrassed and Chanyeol's just holding his laughter in, really.

"Of course, it's probably the fault of my utensils that there is an eggshell in the egg I ate. I should get a new set of utensils and also a stove, what do you think?"

"Yeah, you should," Baekhyun stubbornly replies.

"Only if you go appliance shopping with me." There's that boyish grin again. It's kinda contagious, a small smile playing on the edges of Baekhyun's own lips now.

How can he not? When he thinks about eating lunch later with Chanyeol, how can he not smile? When he thinks about feeding Chanyeol popcorn as they watch a movie, curled up on the couch under a blanket and being so—

The doorbell rings.

Chanyeol stands up to get it. Baekhyun follows him with his eyes and he's suddenly aware that he's not wearing pants so he should just stay in the kitchen. He prays Chanyeol won't bring the guest to the kitchen.

He overhears their conversation. The guest is actually a girl, and he also hears footsteps even before he hears Chanyeol ask her to come in. There's a familiar feeling settling on the pit of Baekhyun's stomach, a feeling he thought he'd never had to feel again.

"Just stay here on the couch, okay? I'll get some in the kitchen."

Then Chanyeol's opening the sugar container, putting some into an empty container in his hand.

"Just gimme a minute, Baek," Chanyeol says with a pat on Baekhyun's shoulder as he walks back to the living room. Baekhyun didn't even ask anything about it.

It's... not _his_ business, after all.

So why is he feeling like—

Laughter echoes into the kitchen. There's a girl's voice that comes along it.

"Is your sugar as sweet as you, Chanyeol-ah?"

"Probably. You know I'm contagious."

Baekhyun feels so out of place. Why is he still here anyway? Did he really think all those daydreams he had will come true? He was the one who left Chanyeol all those years ago, so why is he expecting this guy to take him again?

And would he again allow this guy to break the heart he tried to fix for so many years?

He loses his appetite. He pushes his chair back with a screech and stands up from the chair.

Chanyeol is still lingering by the front door, chatting with his friend that happens to be a girl.

He takes the staircase in twos and when he reaches the bedroom, he looks for all of his stuff. After putting his pants on, he steals a jacket from Chanyeol's wardrobe.

"What about breakfast?" Chanyeol is standing by the bedroom door.

"I'm not hungry anymore." Baekhyun walks past him and down the stairs.

"You're wearing my jacket, Baek." Chanyeol follows him to the front door.

"I'm borrowing it. Don't worry; I'll wash this before I mail it back to you." Baekhyun puts on his shoes even if his socks aren't properly donned yet.

"What do you mean you'll mail it back to me?" Chanyeol's voice is starting to rise. "You can come back here anytime. We can meet anytime. Just tell me."

"I can do that?" Baekhyun snorts. "And then you'll tell me you're busy but I'd end up seeing you kissing a girl anyway?" Baekhyun lets out a bitter laugh. "I'll look for a good courier so you won't have to worry about your clothes."

If Chanyeol says anything after that, Baekhyun doesn't hear it anymore. He's out of the gates before Chanyeol can formulate a response and he's inside a cab already when Chanyeol runs after him.

_**October 23, 2008** _

_It was another cancelled plan._

_Only this time, it was Baekhyun who was unavailable. He had to attend some sort of workshop for his club. He knew Chanyeol was disappointed even if he said it's fine. But there was nothing that could be done because he planned to attend this workshop from the beginning anyway. A little part in Baekhyun was vindictive that he was able to make Chanyeol feel what he had felt all those times he cancelled. But a bigger part in Baekhyun didn't want Chanyeol to be hurt, especially because of him._

_It was a good thing that the workshop ended earlier than expected._

_He was going to surprise Chanyeol so he went to his classroom without sending him a text message._

_The workshop ending earlier than expected turned out not to be a good thing after all. Because if it finished on time, then Baekhyun wouldn't have to witness Chanyeol smiling down on a girl who's also smiling at him._

_And then it hit Baekhyun._

_They looked good together — the girl and Chanyeol. Seulgi, he remembered the name of the pretty face after he had watched the cheerleading contest days ago. Even if he's gay, Baekhyun knew how to appreciate beauty when he sees it. And Seulgi was like a reincarnation of Aphrodite. She could probably plant a good-looking family tree with Chanyeol and — fuck; Baekhyun didn't want to begin thinking about that._

_The thing about Baekhyun was that he didn't have the courage to change anything; thus, when he saw the horrible reality in front of him, he chose to distance himself away rather than confronting the issue._

_That night, Baekhyun went home with another crack on his heart._

_**December 11, 2015** _

It is like having salt being sprinkled on his wound, rubbing a lemon deep into it. That's heartbreak served in a platter.

_**March 09, 2009** _

_Baekhyun completed all of his requirements even before the final exams._

_He spent the last few weeks of high school avoiding Chanyeol and it was honestly easier than he expected. They were both busy and they weren't classmates this year so it wasn't a task at all. But he did miss his boyfriend..._

_"Baekhyun, get your things ready. We're going now," his mother said._

_The passport in Baekhyun's hand was heavy._

_"Can't I drop by Chanyeol's house before we go to the airport?"_

_"Honey, we've done our part collecting your diploma and other documents so you can go to college in the States, we couldn't do a farewell party for you as well. I told you that goodbyes should have been done weeks ago and not now that we're already going to the airport."_

__But I spent weeks ago avoiding him, _Baekhyun wanted to retort. It's his fault._

 _For not grabbing Chanyeol away from the girl who kissed him. He threw the possibility of Chanyeol initiating that kiss because it just_ couldn't _happen._

_It was his fault. For running away when there were matters to handle. Guess he could escape everything all at once now when he's going to the States._

_Without leaving anything behind.  
_

_**December 21, 2015** _

Baekhyun doesn't even know Chanyeol's address. He just knows it's along the Apgujeong area and nothing else. He realizes this when he's filling up details in the form for the mail. The form asks for a house number and complicated stuff like that.

Baekhyun doesn't know.

Stupid.

How can he return that guy's clothes now?

_**January 23, 2016** _

He can't take it any longer. It's too heavy in his chest and Baekhyun knows he's going to explode soon. He just didn't think it will be this soon — when he's watching a sappy romance movie with his two friends.

Why did he even agree to this...

The movie is forgotten when, like a ticking time bomb, he bursts a river of tears.

Jongin and Sehun are there when Baekhyun bawls his eyes out, saying that it's his entire fault for being this and that. The couple can't even understand everything their friend is telling them, all punctuations morphing into hiccups and dripping with snot. The sight must have been unappealing when the couple make sour faces just looking at their friend.

"Ch-chanyeol..." He can't finish the sentence.

"What did Chanyeol hyung do to you to make you like this?" Jongin asks him, rubbing circles on his back to calm him down.

Sehun speaks in a soft voice. "Perhaps, was he too rough?"

Jongin throws him a look that tells him he has asked the wrong question and just, leave all the talking to Jongin.

Baekhyun seems not to be offended at what Sehun implied, but his ears do turn red. "N-no, Chany-yeol is..." He takes a deep breath and tries to calm down. "He's my ex-boyfriend."

The storytelling takes longer than it should have been because of all the pauses Baekhyun has to make to clarify his words. By the end of it, the tears have stopped falling. The heavy feeling in his chest seems to have been dispelled along with the truth. 

"How can I forget him? He's been the only one I've wanted ever since he made me feel special. It's not easy to just erase him from my memory when he takes almost every part of the happy memories I have."

"Forget?" Jongin asks. "Are you sure that's what you want to do, hyung?"

"Are you sure you want to forget him, hyung?" Sehun asks.

Does Baekhyun want to forget Chanyeol?

Months after their little _reunion_ and he admits, raises a white flag in surrender, he really misses the tall guy.

So does he really want to forget?

_**February 15, 2016** _

He ends up with a half-filled glass of Jack and its empty bottle beside it. His cheek is plastered on the bar counter and the EDM is making his head spin again and again. It brings him back to _the night_ that messed up his life.

Jongin and Sehun just can't get him — they haven't been through the emotional rollercoaster that Baekhyun felt from those years. Words of advice are easy to tell but it's difficult to follow. He wants to forget, so maybe alcohol can solve his problem.

But now, after many glasses, he thinks that even alcohol can't drown his heartache. Even the guy in one of the tables looked like Chanyeol, or the other bartender, or the one that attempted to have small talk with him a few minutes back. They all look like Chan-fucking-yeol. Even if his mind is in a haze, he's still thinking about Chanyeol.

When can the alcohol take effect?

He pulls a wad of bills from his wallet and leaves it under the bottle. The bartender has been pretty nice to him tonight. He jumps down the stool and hobbles to the entrance of the bar where he collides with someone.

"S-sor-" he hiccups, "-ry."

The person grips his arms and makes him stand straighter. It's a high level of Gaussian blur he's looking at, but at the same time, it's a familiar figure.

But Baekhyun's intoxicated, so how can he be sure?

"W-would you jushh l-leave me alone? Jushh stop making me lose my balance!" He slurs. It's another face of Chanyeol intruding his vision. The alcohol might have actually worsened his condition, now that he thinks about it.

"No, you're obviously too drunk to get home safe. I'm taking you there."

Baekhyun scoffs. His irritation is making him sober. "Then what? Get some girl in the morning and- and..." No, there are no tears this time, it's just snow melting on his cheeks. "Please don't take my heart only to break it. Don't make me fall in love if you're only gonna hurt me."

"Goddammit, Baek. Just- listen to me, okay? I didn't kiss anybody else but you. And nobody kissed me but you. Maybe you were looking at the wrong angle but- I swear I didn't cheat on you."

Baekhyun's just giving him a blank look because nothing actually gets registered in his mind when he's shit drunk like this. He thinks this guy is a madman, screaming some things at him. What is he talking about?

Just as Baekhyun is about to walk away, he gets pulled into a firm chest, the scent making him sob.

It's _him_.

"Don't run off on your own again, Baek," he says against soft tufts of hair. "Take me with you, wherever you will go."

There are kisses peppered on the crown of his head, Baekhyun feels dizzy because of them. He lets Chanyeol take him wherever.

»»» 

Baekhyun ends up asleep on Chanyeol's car and when he wakes up, he's sober again. Chanyeol is holding one of his hands while the other is maneuvering the steering wheel. Baekhyun can feel the younger guy's thumb rubbing small circles on the back of his palm.

When he gets out of the car, it's not his and Jongin's shared apartment that he sees but Chanyeol's house. His boots get buried a few centimeters deep into the snow for staying on the same spot for a long time just looking at the house he's doubting to enter.

His doubts are thrown out of his mind when Chanyeol looks back at him and sees his hesitation, so the latter laces his hand around Baekhyun's wrist to urge him to get inside with him with a promise of- "I won't try anything on you."

The night goes smoothly — Chanyeol waiting up for Baekhyun to get changed and giving him more blankets because it seems like the heater is not enough and leaving the bedside lamp as the only thing that lights up the room.

Chanyeol's by the door when Baekhyun speaks up in a soft voice, barely audible but it still makes Chanyeol turn to look at him again if he needs something. The concern is etched on his face.

"You can— I mean, uhm. Can you stay?"

Chanyeol smiles a little as he walks back to Baekhyun's bed. He ruffles Baekhyun's hair first before settling with him under the blankets.

_**February 16, 2016** _

Baekhyun wakes up with warmth but with all the blankets on the floor. Chanyeol's body is draped over him and their position kinda squishes him, truthfully.

He looks at the time across the room, finding out that it's past ten in the morning already.

"Yeol." He pokes the said person on the cheek. When the said person only groans but doesn't move, the urge to punch him is strong in Baekhyun's gut.

He tries calling out his name again, pushing him away this time. Then Chanyeol slowly opens his eyes, smiling immediately when his gaze lands on Baekhyun.

Maybe it is because of that smile. Or the implication that Chanyeol wants to wake up next to him as much as he wants that, too. Maybe it is because of last night. Whatever it is, Baekhyun's ready to forgive Chanyeol and himself.

"Do you want to grab brunch together?"

Chanyeol's shocked expression is soon replaced with excitement, his eyes glinting. "The two of us?"

"Is there anyone here to invite other than you?"

Chanyeol grins. The smile is contagious.

Like always.

_**March 23, 2016** _

Sehun and Jongin roll their eyes at the same time just looking at the couple huddled on the couch, feeding each other popcorn and tearing up over a sappy romance movie or drama or whatever it is. They're always like this for the past weeks they have been together. If not this, messing up the kitchen with the stuff they bake. If those cakes weren't delicious, Jongin would have honestly kicked Baekhyun out, hyung or not.

"I kinda regret bringing Baekhyun hyung to that party now."

"I know. I kinda regret using his Instagram account follow Chanyeol hyung's."

They continue to watch the both of them until they wipe each other's tears and start kissi— _shit, the image has been burned into the back of their eyelids by the time they look away._

**Author's Note:**

> Mods' Notes: During the duration of BAE2016, we're kindly asking you to leave your reviews on [Livejournal](http://baeconandeggs.livejournal.com/30765.html). Thank you for reading!♥


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